Howard, The Universe, and Everything!

Moving

Tue, 02 May 2006 21:52:46 GMT

Dear Howard,
If you want to keep up with me...I'm moving. In Cyberspace. I can now be found at http://howardtheuniverseandeverything.blogspot.com

later
Paul

A pie in the face and two guys named Bush

Tue, 02 May 2006 01:10:30 GMT

Dear Howard,
Que un dia hoy! That's Spanish Howard. It means what a day today...I think. I don't speak great Spanish, but I'm trying. I dunno if you knew it Howie, but today is May Day. Not that thing those commies used to celebrate. I have no idea what day that is. Today is the day thousands upon thousands of illegal (and probably some legal) immigrants in the United States decided to not go to work and school so that people would see the impact Latinos have on the good ol' US of A.

Some other cool things happened (or were supposed to happen) in the last 24 hours too Howie. Bush gave this whole rigormoral thingamajig up in DC last night. To make the event a tad more light-hearted he hired a Bush impersonator. Some guy named Bridges. For the record all he did was take an anagram with a bunch of vowels and say E-I-E-I-O and called Laura Bush hot (according to everything I read). Stephen Colbert apparently hosted the event to take some potshots too. I guess the point was to poke fun at the Commander-in-Chief. Kinda pointless when you're hired by the Head Honcho himself. Oh well.

Johnny Damon also played his first game in Fenway Park as a New York Yankee. I was listening to the game on the radio when he came up for his first at bat. I never heard so much booing in my life. Apparently he tipped his hat to the crowd and then the home team dugout. Later on when he was in centerfield people threw dollar bills at him.

There was also a massive nationwide strike of sorts held today. Tons of Latinos protested government reform of immigration laws. They protested by not going to school or work. They wanted America to see what it would be like if they weren't around. They also resolved to not buy American stuff. I personally ran into it in my hometown. I took an unusual route home so I could snag some gas from the station with the lowest prices in town. On the way home I saw people marching through the streets. They chanted a few things. Like I said my Spanish ain't so great, but I caught a few things. There was "Si, Se Puede!" This is an old agricultural chant from what I understand. It means yes I can or yes we can. I'm not sure which, but the message is clearer than my direct translation of Spanish. There was another chant I didn't understand. Which is a shame as part of the point of the protest was to make a point to Americans. Sadly a lot of us don't speak Spanish, and even those of us who do don't speak GREAT Spanish. Hell, I'm even trying and I struggle. I also heard some guy yell out "Vivos los Latinos!" I clapped when I heard that. Still not sure why. It means "Long live the Latinos"...once again....roughly.

Then the greatest shaft of all occurred today. See I was going to do this things for the kids at the school I work at. I was trying to raise some money for a schoolwide donation to cancer research. I decided to get the kids in on it by saying the one kid who donated the MOST money to this cause would get to hit me in the face with a pie on closed circuit television broadcast to the whole school. Not a huge response financially, but I am now known as "Pieface" to the whole student population. I insist on Mr. Pieface, but it doesn't always carry. However, there was also ITBS testing today. The higher ups thought it best to not have pies thrown in faces the day of testing. I agree, but I don't have to like it.

The thing about the pie thing is...it wasn't really supposed to be about the money for cancer research. Sure that's a FANTASTIC cause. I've yet to meet anyone who thinks cancer is just awesome. I wanted to do something more though. I wanted to give the kids something MEMORABLE from their years at elementary school. Frankly, I can think of a better memory than sticking it to the man. I mean...even at this age these kids...even the young ones...have resistance and resentment of authority. They need a vent, and even if they don't throw it....watching a teacher catch a pie in the kisser has got to feel good.

It's kind of a universal theme all around I think. Kids want to throw pies in their teachers faces. Immigrants want to stick it to the rest of America by showing them what it would be like if they weren't around. Sox fans want Damon to know how much he is hated by them, and in return Damon wants Sox fans to know how much it doesn't phase him. Lord knows Presidents need mocking Howard. It kinda takes away some of the fun if it's self-imposed (whether it be me or Bush), and that raises a whole bunch of other questions Howie. But the thing is...ya still wanna stick it to the man.

Everybody wants to stick it to somebody somehow. Why not says I? We're all ignored somehow. Furthermore, we're ignored unfairly. We all get taken advantage of. Trampled on. Forgotten in one way or another. I don't think revenge is necessarily smart, but you still want it. You want to be remembered even if it stings people when they do remember you. I think it's apart of this idea that people want to be immortal Howard, but we all know that isn't possible. We do what we can by having kids, getting famous, or just trying to leave our mark on a little rock that according to what I know won't matter when the Sun turns into a Red Giant in roughly 3 million years Armageddon or no.

Anyway Howard....I know I won't find the answers tonight. Maybe I'll look in the fridge. If the answers aren't there I know something that is there. It's called ice cold beer. Tasty.
Have a good one Howie.
Yours,
Paul

Dark Energy and Coffee...One in the same?

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 23:08:22 GMT

Dear Howard,
I think I had one cup of coffee too many today. You know how you get when your stomach kinda turns, and you feel like you have to burp, but you can't. Your jaw hurts and your mouth tastes like a used coffee filter. That's me Howie. One cup over the line. Oh well. I can't do much about it.

But let me tell you what I can't get enough of Howard. Physics. I've been reading a little bit about different theories concerning physics and it's truly mind blowing. Magnetism, Earnshaw's Theorem, Diamagnetism, Dark Energy, Anti-Gravity, the constant expansion of the Universe (assuming that is the case). It blows my mind because stuff you assumed to be impossible is not only possible, but may have even happened.

Did you know they levitated a frog once with Science Howard? They used principles of diamagnetism to suspend a frog. The frog was unharmed, and no magnets were attached. It was just the frog itself. It was pretty crazy stuff, and I just read about it. I didn't even see it.

Of course to understand it better I have to read about Calculus. Frankly Howard that idea scares the hell out of me. See...I was told my whole life I would not be good at Math. They even told me I have mathematical learning disabilities. I believe that, but here is what I don't believe Howie. That I can't do something. If I want to do something...there is no doubt in my mind I could do it.

Belief is the only force in this World I have control over. And I think belief can make things happen Howard. I can only control me and only to a certain extent. Whatever conciousness is I am only aware of it.

But Physics Howard. Physics. How could I not resist this? Man made laws require a whole system of jobs and enforcers just to make them work part of the time. Physics? Those are a constant. They work almost all of the time whether you want them to or not. Granted I'm excluding quantum physics here H-Man, but I gotta take baby steps.

How come you never write back?
Hope you're doing well,
Paul

P.S. I wonder if physics can cure the effects of one cup of coffee too many

22 years later

Sun, 30 Apr 2006 15:42:01 GMT

Dear Howard,
I saw the weirdest thing this morning. I was driving back from Big City Bread and I saw a bumper sticker that read as follows.

"Safe Sex=Abstinence"

It was so bizzare man. I sorta stopped to ponder the oxymoronic nature of the sticker. See...abstinence is abstaining from sex meaning you aren't having any sex. So if you aren't having ANY sex you aren't having safe sex at all. Abstinence is not sex. So the bumper sticker seems really idiotic to me.

That's the World we live in Howard. Mara keeps telling me I'm to analytical. She'll move her hand and I'll ask her why she did it. I always skip over the easy answers and go straight to the hard ones sometimes. I forget the idea that maybe her hand was uncomfortable or her arm fell asleep and immediately assume it's symbolic of how she feels. I've just spent most of my life having people's actions contradict what they told me I'm kind of in shock over this girl who says what she means and her actions are just actions. No symbolism involved.

The thing about it is that I think being this analytical is good sometimes. I just need to learn to turn it off and on. It's helped me out a lot, and I feel is the key to me getting smarter and wiser. I remember one time I said something to my Uncle about learning from the past or my attitude towards the past and it's relevency to the future and he said "That's called Wisdom." It felt weird to have one of my major living role models say I had something akin to wisdom.

But Howard....this is the thing that bothers me the most. I feel like stuff like this ISN'T wisdom. Someone printed this on a sticker, someone decided to stock and sell it, someone decided to buy it and put it on their car, and none of them stopped to consider the glaring contradiction of abstaining from sex not being sex at all. I'm not saying anything about abstinence. This isn't about abstinence Howie.

It's about people not thinking, and I feel like I see it everywhere I go. People don't want to stop and worry about their actions. They don't want to stop and say "Is this smart? Am I doing the right thing?" There is something to be said for going with the flow, but you gotta draw the line somewhere don't you?

The problem is I'm not sure how to explain this to someone who...at least to me...doesn't appear to be reasoning. I mean...let's face it...this is a widespread problem. It's not just confined to conservatives or Americans either. This planet is full of folks not thinking about what they're doing, and we all do it from time to time. I'm casting a stone, but I am far from free of sin.

I guess it boils down to timesavers. As much as I think a bumper sticker that states "I feel the only way to prevent the spread of STDs, and stop unwanted pregnancies is to abstain from sexual intercourse" would make more sense it's a tad big for a car. Even if you got one of those big ass bumper stickers it would probably not go over well.

But hey....who has time for civilized discourse about politics? Right? I mean aside from being too busy to stop and discuss things and come to a mutually beneficial conclusion....we all have places to be.

Guess I won't find an answer this time around.
Let me know if you find one Howard.
Peace out,
Paul

Evidence for the thesis

Sat, 29 Apr 2006 14:36:30 GMT

Dear Howard,

What times I've had lately. New band, new job, new people, and old habits. I'll openly admit that I've been thinking about those people again. You might not know who I mean Howard, but people who've read you since before I named you know who they are. The problem is I don't do it out of nostalgia, or longing, or even regret. It's mostly a bad habit. It's kinda like smoking except there is no patch that makes you not think about people you don't really want around. They aren't around either, but it still occupies my brain. Actually it's more like a rash. Rashes suck.

Anyway, I've had very mixed feelings about my band lately. I love my new band and the music we play and it's already given me some cool experiences. I now know that I refuse to set foot on stage again without a good cinder block and a small carpet. I never quite got why drummers had these, but I tore a big hole in the non-batter side head of my kick drum last night for not having these things. I was a tad upset, and tried to stop a song, but the singer kept going. It sucked.

I did however get to be at Relay for Life. I had mixed feelings about it. For starters it was mostly occupied by the "Greeks" on the UGA campus. I use the term greeks in quotations because they aren't actually greek. They use greek letters. They're sororities and fraternities. I don't harbor any particular feelings against these organizations. They're just people like me with flaws and problems. They're just people I don't understand. Oh man that reminds me of another story. I'll get back to Relay in a second.

So I was at Tasty World to see a show and there was a concert upstairs called "Rock for Iraq". I didn't go see the show because the title kind of appalled me. I've also found that being vocal about my opposition to Iraq in a red state is about as smart as tattooing 666 on my forehead and then going to a Baptist Church. So I refrain. However, there were a lot of people who were wearing baseball caps and polo shirts. A girl talking about how badly she wanted to be a divorce lawyer and she was gonna be good at it because she looked out for #1 (herself) and so on. It was in this conversation with this girl I had an interesting awakening. She asked me about gauged ears because I was wearing some punk rock clothes I think. She asked if they hurt. I said I had never had my ears gauged but had friends who had and they all told me it didn't hurt. She said she asked this other guy who was sitting behind us (by the looks of it it was some sort of militant vegan and possibly an anti-racist skinhead too) and he flat out said "I'm sorry. I don't talk to people like you."

I realize the guy and his friends probably had a good chuckle over this stupid girl (who was probably going to UGA law next year if I recall correctly), but I was like "What an asshole".

It reminds me of how disgusted I get with punk rockers and indie kids sometimes. I mean....the "Greek" kids are the ones who made fun of us and excluded us when we were kids. There is definitely animosity there. But I didn't get out of their scene only to become them in another scene. I'm not really interested in looking down on people because they look different or dress different or even have different political beliefs. Granted it happens sometimes, but I try to avoid it....ya know?

So anyway....the "Greeks"....raising money for cancer. It got kind of cheesy sometimes because all the people looked and dressed alike to me. They had cheesy activities like that fake sumo wrestling stuff and I even got arrested by a friend who is in a sorority as I walked by her booth. It sucked because I had to go set up my drums shortly there after. So anyway...cheesiness.

So we play the show and then I'm meandering around....saying hi to folks....handing out stickers...shameless self-promotion of Split-Side Anna (like I just did just now). And they announce they're going to have a silent lap around the track to remember those who died of cancer. I decide to participate in memory of my Uncle Joe (died of Cancer last year). Uncle Joe and I weren't that close, but he was my Aunt Barbara's rock and that matters to me because I love my Aunt very very much.

So I'm walking....I like the walking in silence part, but I think it coulda done without the cheesy piano music they're broadcasting over the PA. Then I look next to me and they're is this girl being held by a friend or possibly boyfriend and she's sobbing. Well...maybe not sobbing, but crying quite a bit. I look around more and I see it everywhere. People just crying a lot. I realize they may have lost a parent or a brother or a sister or something to cancer and that may be why they're here.

That's when the cheesy stops bothering me. Not that it's any less cheesy, but I can take it.

I stood and heard a girl sing a song about "Sarah Beth is scared to death." I thought the song itself (melody and lyrics and stuff) were kinda bad, but the story was about a girl who was in high school and had cancer and had to go through Chemotherapy and lost all of her hair. Her prom date shaved his head or something. There was something of value in that even though I didn't really like the song that much.

I also thought it said something that one of the biggest problems we have concerning cancer is that we worry about losing our hair. Nevermind there are cells in our body aggressively attacking us...how do I look? Granted the baldness is an outward message to people that we have a disease that might kill us, but I mean....it's just hair.

But I digress. I realize cancer is a really sucky thing and that to some people hair is uber-important Howard. I just don't care a whole lot about it.

Oh yeah....the band though. Basically it knda bugs me that we're concerned about how many people we're bringing to a club and how much money we're making. It bugs me because I usually didn't get paid in my last bands. I don't get paid in this one, but I don't have to pay to go to gigs or stuff like that which I like. I guess that in order to have a band I don't have to pay to be in I have to put up with the "how much is the club giving us" and "what's the percentage at the door" and "how much is this band going to bring in." I'd still rather not though.

I also don't wanna quit the band because I really like the music. It's not my FAVORITEST band in the World, but the guys are really cool and everyone loves Tom Waits. How could I not like that?

Anyway Howard, I think I'm gonna try and get some sleep. I had to go to work briefly this morning, and I missed some very important not being awake.

Hope you suck,
Paul

El Nombre Nuevo

Sat, 29 Apr 2006 14:12:58 GMT

Dear Howard,

Yes it's true. I've decided to name you. I think I might keep up with a journal if I named it. I'm inspired by my friend Scott's new book which is really really funny. He writes letters to Al-Qaeda, but it's about Al-Qaeda. Me. I write about me. This is a totally self-indulgent waste of time. This journal. The grammar just fucking blows. Let's face it. I suck at grammar. Which is bad because I spend a lot of my workday correcting it, but that's for 4th graders and if I can't tell they won't be able to tell. I know that seems awful, but it's true. I'm smarter than 4th graders.

Anyway, I decided to call you Howard. I'll get to why in a second. I thought about names first. Naming you after a friend? Too creepy. A dead friend? Even creepier. A hero of mine? Well, let's see. There's Jesus...nah. I bet he's busy enough with all the people praying to him. Besides I know Jesus has already taken care of me. That's what I like about being a Christian. Howsabout MLK Junior? Sure! Why not? He would understand me. A good guy from my hometown, but then again....nah. Gandhi has the same problems. Writing to your hero is scary because you've invested power in them. If they disapprove....that's fucking heartbreaking.

How about a hero that I don't really have a lot of admiration for? Ironic? Nah. I have heroes who have no qualities I admire. Before December I would've written to Johnny Damon. If I had my druthers I'd rather write to Al-Qaeda. Nomar? Nah. Andy Kauffman? Nah.

I'm really stuck here. I need someone who I don't really like all that much, but has some qualities I admire. Someone I'd like to thank for doing nice things, but then punch them in the stomach for the bad things they've done. Someone like me. Bingo! CEO of Starbucks. Howard Schulz. I mean he does a lot to make sure his employees have it good, and he's obviously very liberal. But that doesn't change the fact that he is apart of a major American Corporation (which glorifies capitalism...and I hate capitalism), and he is RUINING COFFEE!!!

I know people might disagree with me on this, but it's a fact. Starbucks coffee is burnt. Why is it a fact? It's a simple weight ratio problem. If you roast 600 pounds of coffee beans at a time (which you have to if you're a coffee company as big as Starbucks) then your beans will still roast after you've taken them out of these MASSIVE roasting drums which you could probably fit two or three cars in. The beans STILL roast after you take them out of the roaster and if you let them all cool together....a large portion of them will end up burnt. Which means your coffee tastes more like carbon than coffee.

That part I don't care so much about. It's not my business if you wanna burn coffee.

However....it IS my business if you market a poor product to America and then everyone thinks their coffee is supposed to taste like charcoal the day after a barbecue. It is especially my business when I pay my bills in the summer by working for a smaller coffee company. Fortunately for me I live in a town which only has one full time Starbucks, and only NOW are they thinking of building a second one....and they're building it so far away from where I live in my town I don't even really care that much. I only go out near the mall when I have to.

So there ya go Howard. That's why you have your name. Sorry if I went off on a tagent here and there, but I wanted you to know. I'm feeling particularly write-y this morning so I will be writing you again very soon.

In about 2 minutes.

See ya then,
Paul

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

Tue, 25 Apr 2006 21:21:55 GMT

Well, there is a new day coming which will mark only one thing in my book. A lot of "dark" and "evil" bands putting out their albums, and the release of the remake of The Omen. The Omen by the way is a KICK ASS movie that you should rent if you like horror movies. Not necessarily scary, but definitely creepy.

So anyway....this day is June 6th, 2006 or 6/06/06.

For those of you who are unfamiliar 666 is the mark of the beast. The apostles of Satan will supposedly bear this as their mark come armageddon. I'm not saying I don't believe it, but what I am saying is I have no proof of it. Furthermore, the Bible is all about parables and metaphor...so I highly doubt it will be an actual physical 666.

Anyway, here is my problem. This date is totally arbitrary. Let's review a brief history of keeping track of time...

Time exists. That's a fact. The larger question is what is time? Time (as I perceive it) is the passage of motion through space. The Universe had a point at which it began and time is how we keep track of the Universe stubbornly persisting to exist. I realize I could open up a whole can of worms with this debate among people, but let's assume that for a moment I'm right. Time exists.

We exist. How do I know we exist? Cogito Ergo Sum. I think therefore I am. Thought is proof that we exist. Everything else seems to be totally undetermined to a lot of people who are supposed to be very smart.

So humanity co-exists with time. Suddenly humanity notices it's movement through space. "Gee," it says "I guess I better keep track of this." Thus systems of calendars are invented across the planet based on different things. Passages of seasons. Movement of celestial bodies. In the case of the Aztecs both. Somewhere along the line we decide to mark time by seeing how long it takes our planet to move around the Sun.

The Romans decided to name months after their Gods. Some of the names stuck (January for Janus, June for Juno, and so on).

Enter Jesus Christ. Christ was born at Zero A.D. That's the only impact he has on this argument.

Constantine! No...not the movie with Keanu Reeves (although I do like that movie a lot). Constantine the Emperor of what is then the....Byzantine Empire. Can't say for sure because I didn't study a lot of ancient history. Mostly Latin American history. Anyway, Constantine converts and thus the largest empire on Earth converts to Christianity. As a result of Christendom flourishing...the calendar that started at Zero A.D. is also adopted.

Through a series of events the Christian Calendar is accepted as the medium by which the occupants of Terra Firma mark time.

When you think about it happening....the date came into passage through a series of unrelated arbitrary events. This calendar we use is VERY anthropocentric (meaning centered around humanity).

To me it begs the question......Why do we consider June 6th to be such an ominous date? What if the Romans decided to have 2 month calendar instead of a 6 month calendar? What if Christ was born 10 years earlier? What if leap year were happening this year and the 6th got bumped back a day?

Case in point....it doesn't really matter what day it is. Our measurement of time does not need to dictate fear, love, or release of horror movies.

Our measurement of time is arbitrary. Don't let the calendar man made fuck up your day.

That's all I got right now.

DAMMIT!!!

Wed, 19 Apr 2006 02:23:50 GMT

So I was doing this thing at www.findyourspot.com

It's supposed to help you find out where you would be happy living. Almost all of the places were Massachusetts. Including the first 4.

Dammit.

Whoa

Sun, 16 Apr 2006 03:32:01 GMT

OK. So for starters.....Soldiers in the Army of God. Rent it. Watch it. Creepiest movie I've ever seen. It scared me to know there are people out there who are ready and willing to kill over something that in the grand scheme of things....to me at least....isn't that important. Not that abortion doesn't show up on my political radar. However, it's a blip next to things like war, greed, and poverty. All things that I perceive as related.

Anyway...my story for today.

So I was watching a movie with some friends and I called Mara to invite her over. She didn't pick up. Can't say I was panicked, but I was definitely intrigued. So anyway, It began to freak me out because she called later but didn't discuss why she didn't want to come out.

So I went through the rest of my day and even discussed with one of my friends how she had said that and it had me slightly panicked, but not really.

So after my friends leave and I'm at home I give Mara a call. I ask her what's going on and she says she's been feeling sick all day. Something as simple and stupid as that.

Now I admit that a lot of the problem here is my own analytical nature. I love to analyze stuff. I believe truth exists and analysis is how you find it. That truth has manifested itself time and time again for me. However, there is something everyone else should know when dealing with an analytical mind. Lack of information will not hault analysis. An analytical mind never ceases to think or try to solve whatever puzzle is before it. So therefore, when dealing with an analytical person....give them as much information as is needed, but not much more. An analytical mind with no information will probably jump to conclusions based on a lack of evidence and it could make everything worse for everything involved.

And to my fellow analyticals...

Let's not forget that in life, as well as other areas, analysis without evidence is pointless and to be avoided no matter how attempting it is to draw conclusions.

Now I have to go bed.

Mon, 10 Apr 2006 03:38:23 GMT

So I was driving home tonight thinking about theories and philosophies concerning how bands operate and theories on how and why one performs and something occurred to me. A lot of those theories are based on interaction with other people.

I thought about it long and hard a little more and it occurred to me that even if I wasn't in a band all the life lessons I have taken away from being a musician I would have learned anyway. The reason is simple.

Life is the cruelest and best teacher. It has hard things to teach us and whether we like it or not, be it with quiet submission or kicking and screaming...we are going to learn.

I'm pretty convinced that this is a solid fact, but unfortunately you can't learn that from me. Life will have to show you in it's own special way.

By gar it's been a while

Sun, 09 Apr 2006 13:18:35 GMT

So I decided since I have a pretty laidback morning with not a lot to do ahead of me that I'd update the old livejournal which I haven't done in a while.

So I'll start with the most recent event.

Me and Travis went to see Alkaline Trio last night and that was pretty kick ass. Against Me! opened up. They were good, but they kept playing songs that I didn't really dig that much. But that's OK. They were still good.

So Travis and I are standing at the back, and I take off my glasses because I figure they're gonna play something that, despite my better judgment, will send me rushing towards the pit. They start off with Cringe, and I make a mad dash for the pit. So that was great because that's one of my favorite Alkaline Trio songs, and then right after that they play Cop and I'm thinking "Huh. Those are the first two songs off of GD. Interesting." Then they start to do the opening riff for San Francisco and I was like "hmmmmmmmmmmmmm." So then Matt Skiba gets on the mic and says hi and whatever and then goes "So a few years ago we put out a record called Gawddamnit. We're gonna play the whole thing tonight."

They did and it was AWESOME!!!

What was cool is that they ended with just Matt on an acoustic doing Sorry About That and then he did Blue in the Face. Then Dan Andriano came out on stage and got an acoustic guitar. He did a song off of Good Mourning that I kinda knew, but not real well (obviously since I can't remember the name). Then he did Standard Break from Life and Emma. He also told a funny story about how he was so afraid he was gonna fuck up his song.

Then they came back and did a lot of songs that are older....which I liked. They only played a few songs off of Crimson which is good for me because I wanted to sing along and I don't own Crimson. They played both of their originals off of their split with Hot Water Music. I wanted them to do a song or two off of their One Man Army split, but this did not come to pass.

I think my favorite was the last number. Matt Skiba was talking about doing a Misfits cover and wanted folks to sing along. He then proceeded to play Some Kind of Hate which I love, and then they went straight into Radio which is possibly one of my favorite Alkaline Trio songs.

So that's how that went. No encore because they played for 2 and a half hours. No encore was necessary.

So let's see. What is new with me.

For starters Boston is 4-1, but the season is young. However, I like it when Boston is doing well.

I am playing drums again. Heist is no more. Heidi decided she didn't want to do Heist anymore. It was kind of sad for me because I knew it just meant no more me in the band. Alex is her boyfriend and a good bassist. It would be stupid of her to not use him. So all they really did was replace their drummer....me. That's fine. I can always find another gig as a drummer.

Which I did. I now play drums for Split-Side Anna. I like this band a lot. I think they have good goals as musicians, as a band and as people. Furthermore I feel like they have the means to accomplish those goals.

I work at an elementary school and I love it, but I'm looking for ways to make a bit more money so I can live with a bit more financial security.

I don't like to jinx stuff so I'll just also add that I'm seeing a very very lovely girl who I really enjoy spending time with. That's all.

I've been pondering grad degrees and stuff, but I wanna make sure I really wanna study whatever I pick. On the block right now are various educational masters, psychology of some kind (focusing specifically on relationships), and recently....possibly studying some kind of physics. I would have to do a lot of independent study when it comes to physics though. Basically I'm really interested in these complex physics that seem to lend themselves to the idea that God does exist. I think that in our lifetime their could be a breakthrough that could unite certain fields of physics, or even go so far as to make humanities and science one big gigantic field of study. I gotta wait and see though. The answer of what to do will be revealed to me in time.

That's all. Bye!

SHOW!!!

Thu, 30 Mar 2006 20:56:51 GMT

TONIGHT!!!
SPLIT-SIDE ANNA
NEWSPEAK
THE SUNDOGS
@ THE 40 WATT
DOORS @ 9:PM
$5
BE THERE!!!

The cheapest date you'll ever have

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 19:23:29 GMT

I've lately become concerned as I look around my friends. Not for them. They're doing spectacular. I'm a tad concerned about me. I see my friends travelling off to exciting places I've never been before.

Costa Rica, New York City, California, Russia, Hawaii, Milwaukee.

Exciting destinations all with something for them to do that they've never done before.

It worries me because I don't have the money to travel. I'm not THAT great at saving. I mean to, but I just have a hard time trying to make it with the small amount of funds that I have and my absolute refusal to own a credit card. Then I stopped to think about it.

My concern is that my friends are having adventures that I'm not having. However, I have my own set of adventures and I have yet to leave Athens. I spun reggae at a bar without ever having done it before. I once stood on a stage playing bass and remembering it was the same stage I saw Frank Black and Andrew WK perform on (and I get to play there again too). I took an instrument that I swore up and down I would not be able to do, and I've gotten more compliments on playing that instrument than any other instrument I've played before. This is just the surface really too.

It occurred to me that, yes these adventures have cost me some money, but these are adventures I can continue to create with only a little bit of capital invested in it. Think about it. I could one day travel around the country as a drummer, and maybe someone else will foot the bill (maybe I will), but it's possible that I could do all the stuff other people are doing in another way.

I guess the long and the short of it is that I shouldn't worry for two reasons. The first reason is that my adventures are my own just as theirs are their own. We all have our own lots in life and shouldn't be concerned if someone else gets to do something we don't because we get to do something they don't. It's quite exciting when you think about it.

Furthermore, adventures don't have to take place in exotic or wild far off places that you've never seen. I think if you spend enough time closely examining where you are you'll discover there is a wealth of things you haven't even seen on your own street. That's what makes life so fascinating. You'll never see it all. Even next door could be something so exciting you can hardly stand it.

So that's something to look forward to isn't it?

Here comes another rant!!!

Sun, 12 Mar 2006 21:01:23 GMT

So I was perusing some MySpace posts and I came across this one that was like "To every guy....blah blah blah".

The basis of the post was that the nice guys out there are appreciated and girls are really looking for this kind of guy etc. etc. and so on. It ended with this in all caps "TO ALL GUYS WHO AREN'T JUST TRYING TO GET LAID!"

See....now I have a problem.

First of all it pisses me off when some girls are like "All men want is sex". It pisses me off because it's such a fucking stereotype. I mean....give me some fucking credit here. First off I hate it when it's said to my face. I can hear you talking! I'm right here and I'm a guy too!!! I'm sure some guys are thinking with their wee-wees, but I'm a little bit deeper than a constant drive to keep my dick satisfied and frankly I'm insulted that on the one hand you talk about demanding your equal rights but have the gaul to tell me to my face that I am nothing more than an animal whose sole purpose in life is sex. Is that feminism? I submit that it is not.

Second of all....let's get something straight. Girls like sex too. Last I checked...women liked having sex with men too. And furthermore....based on conversations I've had with some women....sometimes they're just looking to score too. That's it! Just a good ol' one night stand. It happens! And if you can look me in the eye and tell me that you have never one night just...wanted some...and nothing more....I will call you a liar. Cuz you'd be lying.

Now...lemme discuss the "nice guy" for a second here.

I've been the nice guy, and ya know what happens when you're the nice guy? Women pass you up. They will cruise right past you to some other guy. The reason? Simple. It's a very human quality to want something you can't have. The nice guy (as I have come to understand the definition) won't play games and will be totally honest with you. This translates to making it clear to you that you can have him. Ergo...he is passed by. It's not a solid fact or a rule, but it happens.

I want to make this next part....absolutely clear.

Ladies....you are not all princesses. Some of you are one of the following qualities. Loud. Obnoxious. Demanding. Controlling. Angry. Stuck up. Stupid. Overly high maintenance. Careless. Vindictive. Selfish. The list goes on. I'm sure Daddy thinks you are a perfect angel, but you ain't my daughter. I will see your imperfections.

I seem to keep meeting a lot of girls who want to be treated like a queen or something along those lines and be taken care of and stuff like that. Seems to me a LOT of them aren't thinking about what that entails. Being taken care of puts you in a position of submission. If you are submissive you are lesser. This destroys the idea of equality.

I can only speak for myself, but I know what this guy is looking for. More than anything else I am seeking a female that I can treat as an equal and who will do likewise for me. That's why they call it a "partner". When you did school projects and you had a partner did one person do all the work (well.....maybe that's a bad example) but the idea behind it isn't. E-Q-U-A-L-I-T-Y. Equality mother fuckers.

You want to be treated like the Queen? Rock and roll. Find some guy who wants to treat a bitch like a queen and you'll be set. Just remember if you want that it is my opinion that you will be Queen of one domain. The kitchen. And be prepared to rule barefoot and pregnant. And do me one more favor. Stay the hell away from me. I have no interest in a prissy girl who wants to be a housewife while I bring home the bacon. That idea of Americana has never really sat well with me. I want a partnership. I do want my kids to be able to have a parent at home when they are younger to take care of them, but I have no problem with that parent being me. I also have no problem with having a housewife, but if she is a housewife it will be a mutually agreed upon decision and I'm sure LOTS of compromise will come along the way.

So ladies before you mouth off about men being sexist or chauvinist (and make sure you look up those words before you use them too) stop and ask yourself.....are you sexist too? And not just towards men and what they are capable....towards women and yourself and what you are capable of. bell hooks states very clearly that men who are liberated from sexism are a worthy ally in the struggle to defeat the patriarchy, and furthermore that women who are not liberated of sexism are just as much the enemy as men who aren't. The fight against sexism is just that. The fight against sexism. Not men.

I think that's a good note to end on.

Further proof that Ann Coulter is a dumb bitch

Thu, 02 Mar 2006 04:20:52 GMT

I'd apologize Gordon, but I think after reading this article....even you would agree....this is just unintelligible dribble. I'm not even saying Ann Coulter sucks because she is conservative...I wrote better stuff than this when I was a Liberal Pundit for the Red and Black. Here let me list the resume I had when I applied for that job.

Experience in Journalism: None
Qualifications: Warm body, ability to type

And yet I could probably write Ann Coulter under the fucking table.

If you are going to ask the obvious question "Why don't you have a nationally syndicated column/book deal/guest spots on Fox News?" Here are my answers.

A) I don't want them. I'm very content with my current job.
B) I never tried to get any of those things. I'm pretty convinced I can do whatever I want to in life if I actually try, and I never really tried to get Ann Coulter/Sean Hannity/Mike Drudge's job.
C) I am not a douchebag who broadcasts their unresearched facts in nationally syndicated columns, books, and on Fox News (or any American news conglomerate for that matter). I'm just the kind of douchebag who does it over livejournal.

Which reminds me. The following things should be considered facts when reading my livejournal.

1) Damon is a traitor.
2) Angus Young should be the next President of the USA
3) Ann Coulter is a dumb bitch.
4) "30 Helens Agree" is an acceptable way to settle civilized debates (if you don't get this rent the first season of Kids in the Hall....NOW!)
5) "The Rocket" has a special section of Hell reserved for him where I get to kick him in the nuts as many times as I want when I visit.
6) Rock Paper Scissors should be the method by which all diplomatic affairs are handled. Any politicians who disagree are stupid babies and can go sit in time out and think about what they've done.
7) Elvis Costello is better than you.

Why did I start typing? Oh yeah! Ann Coulter is fucking retarded. The proof is at her website in....well pretty much any article, but the one that strikes my fancy the most is the one put out on March 1, 2006. That's today. Here is her website.

www.anncoulter.com

She's a bitch. Peace I'm out!

RIP Charlotte

Sun, 19 Feb 2006 18:36:41 GMT

My Dad called me this morning and said he had bad news. It was weird, but I knew what he was going to say. Charlotte had passed away in her sleep. Charlotte (for those of you who don't know) was the family dog. We got her as my birthday present when I was in second grade. She was a really interesting dog. She had picked up a lot of cat-like behaviors from our family Cat who died at the age of 18. One of those things was a long life (Charlotte was about 15). I have a couple of memories that are my favorites.

When my parents redid the house they put in hardwood floors. Charlotte had a hard time walking on them because she was old at the time and her toenails made her slip. My mom got her these dog booties for her feet so she could walk around without slipping. She was very resistant to us putting them on and when we got them on her she walked around so funny my mom and I were literally on the floor laughing. She walked like that for a few seconds and managed to kick them off.

Charlotte loved peanut butter. It's how we got her to take pills and stuff like that. A favorite family trick was to put peanut butter on top of her nose and watch her crane her neck backwards as she tried to lick it off. One time my sister and I wanted to take Charlotte for a walk but we couldn't find the leash. Charlotte was the kind of dog who would BOLT if she saw an open door or if the leash wasn't working properly. Then one of us had the idea to just take the jar of peanut butter with us and run down the street. It was risky but we did it. We walked down the street the WHOLE way with the jar of peanut butter and some bread. Charlotte did not leave our side for a split second. It was great.

When we first got her on the way home from the humane society Charlotte took a dump in the car. It was fucking hilarious.

I declined to see her being buried today because I like these memories. I remember when our Cat, Cadezia, did die I saw her body in the basement while dad constructed a coffin for her. That's one of the clearest memories I have of her aside from petting her or sleeping on the bed. I don't want that with Charlotte. I like these memories. I like my dog who loved peanut butter, who thought she was a cat, who would sometimes run into cabinets because she was blind in one eye, who would bark at me when I tried to make her roll over because she didn't want to. That's my Char Char. That's who I'm gonna remember.

Bye Charlotte. I love you.

Charlotte
December, 3 1989-February 19, 2006

Fuck yeah

Sun, 19 Feb 2006 13:28:24 GMT

http://boston.redsox.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/news/article.jsp?ymd=20060216&content_id=1313520&vkey=spt2006news&fext=.jsp&c_id=bos

It's still not starting fast enough for me.

Take that internet folklore

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 01:07:15 GMT

After reposting virtually no chain letters which promised love if posted, and threatened misery if not posted....I am going on a date tonight.

You can take your web chain letters and shove it.

Thu, 09 Feb 2006 21:10:50 GMT

Read this first...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4697896.stm

OK. So I know what Bush says he is doing this for. This is what I think. I think Bush was trying to find a graceful way to cave on a demand that the American people need proof that the War on Terror is working. And by graceful I mean he's trying to keep his tough guy image while doing exactly what the people want. A tricky skill in politics.

Lemme break down why I think this...

Basically I think that the American people have been reassured that the War on Terror is working and we are winning significant gains. However, we've lacked examples, and I feel the current administration has not been forthcoming. Are there examples out there? Sure! I'm sure if you dug around you could find something, but let's face it....most Americans do NOT dig. I think we live in a society where we're used to being spoonfed, and being in an elementary school trying to get the kiddies to use their brains has convinced me of this even further.

All of this aside....it's quite the reasonable request. I mean...if I hire somebody to do something for me...I want proof the job got done. When my toilet backed up in my house the plumber who fixed it left a standard detailed report without request. Why? Because he knows anyone wants to know that who they hired is going to do the job they hired them to do. I do consider the U.S. Government an employee. I am an adult. I do pay taxes....point out that I pay less than others if you like, but it does not negate the fact that I pay taxes. I don't agree with a war on terror (because the concept is a little bizzare to me), but OK....if you're gonna get rid of ALL the terrorists in the World....do it. And show me proof.

Until today...I don't feel I've really had that proof. Which shocks me. For two reasons. For starters I know that letting the terrorists in on our intelligence is a bad idea. Duh. That's a bad idea. However, I think if you already CAUGHT someone....you should be able to show that you did it and not let the cat out of the bag. Furthermore....Why the fuck AREN'T you flaunting it!?!?! If you have a program that is working despite coming under VERY heavy criticism....you better trumpet every victory you got.

For me...this is beyond me being a liberal and Bush and his gang being conservative. I'm not even sure I like myself self-applying the label, but for all intents and purposes....yes...I am a liberal. But even if I am...so what!???!?!?!! I wanna start calling this administration what it is. Closed and secretive. That's bad. We've hired these people to handle the most money and...on a federal level...what we are allowed to do and not allowed to do. Fuck whether or not they're conservative. Secretive is BAD. And a lot of the American Right is starting to voice this opinion too. I believe there was a Republican Congressman in Time who was around for Bush I and was talking about how Bush II is very closed off and has his "circle of trust" and how it is (and I am paraphrasing here) fucking retarded. Bush 1 didn't run it that way. And frankly (and this seems like a non-sequitir, but bare with me) I hate Reagan. I think Reagan was a stupid dick. I'm not really interested in having any future political leaders who idolize him like Bush II does now.

OK. That's all I got.

What does freedom mean to me?

Fri, 27 Jan 2006 21:25:21 GMT

"Freedom isn't free"

Someone actually said that to me today in response to my away message, and now....I'm going to rant.

That's OK though....Amanda and I determined that my life is one big rant. Certainly makes it interesting.

So my away message today was "Fuck getting money fo' real! Get freedom!"

And a friend responded with that fucking bumper sticker.

So here is my question.....If freedom isn't free....is it still freedom?

I mean....if I have to do something...that is if there is a prerequisite to freedom...than am I free?
Because if I have to do something that I didn't want to do....how am I still free? Why do I have this hoop to jump through?

More than this question that...to me...is unanswered. I'm really tired of these fucking slogans. These colors don't run. Freedom isn't free. Support our troops. United we stand. Some of them have some merit to them....but they're so broad...what the fuck do they even mean? I think about things adnauseum and I haven't even really thought about them...what are the odds the people who stick them on the back of their car have thought them through. The answer is....pretty slim.

OK. For real. This is a very important question for me to answer for myself. Freedom isn't free. True or false. Granted that isn't really a question, but I think you get what I need here people. I would love feedback and ideas concerning the topic so I can determine it for myself (Gordon...I'm looking in your direction).

That's all I got. Ummm....Ween rules.

Light years away

Sat, 21 Jan 2006 23:03:09 GMT

So it's amazing to me when I think about it. Bridgewater, MA. I left Bridgewater about 5 years ago. Memories of Bridgewater are not surprising. They're still crystal clear. The people I met. The small town. The city of Boston. The friends I made (and still have). The art building and playing Snood all fucking day. My boss who was obsessed with the Rock (the wrestler...not the movie or the music genre). Bridgewater is crystal clear.

But that's not what amazes me. What amazes me is what I've put in between me and that tiny New England town. I went to a bunch of different schools and did a bunch of different things. I've worked at a summer camp (which changed my life in numerous ways). I was a vegetarian for a while. I quit eating pork for about three years. I've had about 4 different pairs of glasses. I've learned way more about coffee than I ever thought I would. I took up drums again. I was in a very terrifying car wreck. I got arrested. I lived in Downtown Atlanta. Had my heart broken. Broke a few hearts myself. Played at the 40 Watt. I went back to England (which I didn't think I'd get to do until I was out on my own). Got 2 tattoos. The list goes on....

It kinda makes me sad because I realize I've been focusing so much on tiny miniscule parts of my life that I've forgotten how amazing my life has been. It's not a Svengali deck where a small amount of events defines it. There are at LEAST 52 cards in there. Hopefully a lot more I haven't even gotten to yet.

It's just hard to focus on the whole picture when you're focusing on the details of the photograph.

Cool.

phew!

Sat, 21 Jan 2006 06:06:02 GMT

http://boston.redsox.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/news/article.jsp?ymd=20060119&content_id=1298309&vkey=news_bos&fext=.jsp&c_id=bos

Two words....thank GOD!

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 12:37:36 GMT

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/4613916.stm

BA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

I shouldn't laugh at his happiness, but I think this is weird.

Long long long

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 12:10:39 GMT

Man oh man. I was so damn tired I went to bed at like 10:PM last night. Brilliant. Fucking brilliant. So now i'ts about 7:AM and I'm wide awake. Such is life. However, January has been such a topsy turvy month for me that I feel the need to update. Let's start small and build.

For starters....I grew mutton chops. It's not quite a beard, but it's not quite sideburns. If I didn't have a full head of hair it would remind me of my boot boy days. I mean hell....I still wear the flight jacket. No but seriously...I used to grow this all the time my freshman and sophomore year, but would get bored and shave it off. I think this time around....it's gonna stick around. It started out as a beard, but the moustache was too irritating and then I didn't like rocking the amish style beard. Voila. Which is French for there. Mutton chops.

Voila. I love that word. Even "there" sounds better in French.

OK. Moving on.

The next big thing to happen to me is I got what I dubbed in my college days as a "big boy" job. It actually just sorta fell into my lap too. So I had been a trainee at the Whit Davis Elementary afterschool program for about two days and I get a call at the coffee shop from the Principal. She said she had me on file as wanting to be a Paraprofessional (teacher's assistant) and would I be interested in the job. So when I get to work the next day I ask Ms. Bliss (my ASP boss) if I can come in early the next day to talk to Ms. Hobson. She says "Let's go talk to her right now." So after a very brief improptu interview she more or less offers me the job. I accept it the next day. So now I got a job that doesn't pay a LOT more than my current job, but it does do one thing Joe's doesn't. Health insurance. Including dental. That's right. I can go to the fucking dentist this semester. Brilliant. Which brings me to the next big thing...

If I have Health Insurance that means I can play fucking rugby again, and since I can only do the B-Side stuff I doubt there will be a ton of pressure on me to be as committed as before. Which makes me fucking thrilled. I love playing rugby, but some people treat it like a job and they wanna win. Don't get me wrong....I would like to win at rugby too. However, I am much more interested in the playing the game part. It's fun! I can't think of a better sport on the fucking planet than Rugby and I thank God that it exists. I just worry about the other aspects that made me quit before. Fortunately two of those were money and time....I have those now.

The last big change in my life is so big....I can't tell you what it is. You'll all know soon enough though. It's pretty flippin' sweet if I do say so myself.

Well.....Now it's 7:09. I hate being awake this early with nothing to do. Maybe I'll clean my room.

later.

P.S. Gordo...that last entry was not you. If I saw you at Schoolkids I would ask what you were buying and then proceed to admire your selection or mock you. Which reminds me....what is your favorite record by the Birthday Party?

I saw you

Thu, 12 Jan 2006 00:06:04 GMT

I saw you at the record store. I think you thought I didn't and hoped I wouldn't recognize you. I did. You turned your head so I wouldn't say hi. I kinda wanted to. We haven't spoken since I lived on Franklin Street. I tried e-mailing you a few times, but you didn't e-mail me back. And since you turned your head and chose not to say hi to me....I returned the favor. If it makes you feel that bad....I won't breach your comfort zone. But I wish you would let it be. I probably wouldn't have been nervous if you hadn't been nervous. I woulda said hi if you had said something. It's all been let go.

Oh well. I'm only in control of my own life, and even then....just barely...not even convinced I am.